Scandalous Stories

Hey’all

Sorry for the delay, but to answer your questions- yes, Morocco was awesome! I had a great time there: hiking in the Atlas mountains, haggling in Marrakech, eating all the great food, and staring at stars in the Sahara; well just the Sahra in general, life long goal…check

So first off, NO! The hostel did NOT BURN DOWN! To be fair, Arwin actually didn’t go away. He was trolling us as usual, and is going away next month. So the hostel ran as usual. I would offer insight, but as I was away, I guess you will just have to check out our instagram page. 

On a personal level I apologize for the delay. When I got back I had too much work to catch up on and I am in the process of applying for my EU permanent residence. So fingers crossed for me. So far, it is off to a horrific start. I am sure I will be ranting and raving in the weeks to come, so I will spare you here…for now. 

Ok, I can’t help myself. Fuck bureaucracy. Fuck lost passports. Fuck- fill in the blank. And just for fun fuck myself too. 

Anyways, I won’t leave you all high and dry. What would this blog be without any hot gossip? So in this week’s; ‘OMG, can you believe what Betti said about ____?’ Ok I am going to be work shopping that name. Well, if you guys have any ideas please post them here.  

So, the number one hot scandal when I was away: people fucking in the elevator! Who was it? Was it hostel guests? Sadly…no. This piece of hot gossip comes right from the manager’s mouth herself (who by the way said she had a lovely time in Sweden with the fam). She said that when she was waiting for the elevator, coming back from the gym, it kept going up and down and up and down. She was like, ‘what the fuck.’ Then finally when it came down, two randoes got out all giggling. What was that? Well obviously there was some steamingly scintillating sex going on in the elevator! If yours truly was there you could have bet that I would have grilled them about their salacious stunt. Are you guys impressed with my alliteration? 

Now scandal number two might be even more brazen and definitely could be a scene from Brazzers; not that I know what that is… 

So, guess what happened in one of our favorite bars? From the lips of one of the best bar tenders in the city; here, to protect his identity, we will just refer to him as…Jake. So, ‘Jake’ said that when he was collecting glasses in Hoff House, he went upstairs to clean up. And right there on the couch, for everyone (possibly even GOD to see), were two girls passionately making out. Just going for it, full tongue and everything. 

Actually, this wouldn’t be that bad, if it wasn’t for the fact that another girl was muff-diving between the legs of one of the girls. When ‘Jake’ came upstairs they started screaming like banshees… like he was in the wrong for interrupting! I mean, they weren’t even on the back couch, that has a curtain for sun’s sake, they could have used to block the view! He threw up his hands and said ‘fair enough!’. The girls, probably still shocked, repeated ‘fair enough’.  They all started laughing. He quickly got the glasses and then went back downstairs, just as they were going back at it…right on, right fucking on! Massive salute to those girls; and, well, to be gender appropriate- the size of the clit on those crazy basterds! Hats off,

I hope this was worth the wait, 

Until the next time, you stay classy world,

-SPICY